


Mystery Island - Amy/Rory, 11, Rose

by charming_angel, needtakehave



Series: Mystery Island [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Roleplay Logs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-11
Updated: 2013-07-10
Packaged: 2017-12-19 03:06:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/878694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charming_angel/pseuds/charming_angel, https://archiveofourown.org/users/needtakehave/pseuds/needtakehave
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's a mystery really. One big island, with hundreds of people just appearing out of nowhere with no idea how they got there or how to get home.</p><p><b>CHARACTERS & PAIRING(S)</b>: Amy/Rory, 11, Rose</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 11 & Rose

**Author's Note:**

> This is a PSL (private storyline) role play between two authors on InsaneJournal. This is not meant to be fanfiction in the normal sense. It's a log of our posts in the PSL RP. Not everything we write is canon - a lot of it is altered for our RP or used with AU (Alternate Reality) characters. Please don't post nasty comments because it doesn't read like normal fanfiction or isn't completely canon. Thanks and enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is happening at the same time as the "Amy & Rory (1)" chapter.

"No, no, no, no," the Doctor called and rushed around the console frantically. "What are you doing?" The TARDIS had started to spin out of control all of a sudden. He had no idea why and couldn't seem to stop it.  
  
"Stop it," he yelled at his ship while pulling handles and pressing buttons. As if on cue the TARDIS stopped spinning, but hit something hard and fell over. Smoke erupted from the console and the gravity stopped working properly.  
  
The Doctor hit the floor, which was now the ground, hard and groaned. Then he quickly pushed himself up, waved off smoke and leaned over the console. Coughing he pushed a few buttons and the gravity came back on. The Doctor stumbled and almost fell again.  
  
"What did you do all that for?" he then asked after the smoke finally subsided. There was no answer of course.   
  
The Doctor pulled down his screen and took a few readings. "Hm... what?" He stared at the readings. "What do you mean you don't know where we are?" He pushed the screen away again.  
  
"Alright, I guess it's time for me to explore..." He spun around, then went for the door and pulled it open.

* * *

Rose had been in the parallel universe for years now, trying to adjust to life with the human Doctor. She'd tried. He'd tried. They'd both tried. They might have made it too. No one told them though -- no one, not even the Doctor, the  _real_ one could have foreseen the future and known that the human version of himself could one day get a fatal human illness like cancer and up and die within three months. 

It had been so fast. Painless, thankfully, but oh so fast.  
  
More than anything, it was crushing to her spirit.  
  
She just didn't know how to go on.  
  
She'd been close to it. Suicide. Her mother had her alt!father, and her brother. Mickey was gone. The real Doctor was gone. Now, her only link to him, the human version of him was gone too.  
  
She'd be on the roof of the Torchwood building  _actually_  contemplating suicide for the first time in her life when like magic, the world around her changed and she went crashing into the hard ground with grass (the roof of the building didn't have grass).

The Doctor opened the TARDIS door and peered out. It looked like he was on a planet, maybe even on Earth. Pulling his bowtie into place he exited his ship and walked out, into a forest, or better a jungle. Everything smelled like nature.   
  
Walking a few minutes the Doctor saw a waterfall. He smiled. It really was nice here. He wished he could share this place with someone, someone special, like...  
  
A sound startled the Doctor and he spun around, arms waving. Then he froze and his mouth dropped open. Just a few feet away was a young blond woman, but not just any blonde. He would recognize her anywhere. But she couldn't be here! It wasn't possible. Rose Tyler was in an alternate reality!  
  
"Hello," he said silently, almost as if he feared that if he spoke louder she would disappear.

Rose was in the middle was getting up off the ground when she heard the familiar sounds of the TARDIS behind her.   
  
She froze, her breath caught in her throat.  
  
Her eyes wide, she turned as she heard 'Hello'.  
  
"Oh My  _God_."

"Not a god exactly, but I can see how someone could mistake me for one," he said jokingly, just so he said something. His brain felt utterly empty all of a sudden and he didn't know what else to say to the woman in front of him. It had been so long. So much had happened since he last saw her. He was a different man now... a married man! Well, for all he knew she was married, too. He had sent her off with the other Doctor after all, the half human version of himself.  
  
Still not sure what to say he fiddled with his bowtie nervously.

Rose couldn't smile, she just couldn't.  
  
"Yeah... you always did like to play God," she said, it coming out harshly. Her mind was confused, shocked and mouth just opened and out came the most hurtful words she could think of. Just moments before she'd gotten here, she had been at the end of her rope and what, here he was? He could be her imagination.  
  
"You're not real."

"Ouch," the Doctor muttered, trying to seem cool, but her words really did hurt. He had often wondered what it would be like if he met Rose again, his Rose, not one from the past, who didn't know him. Apparently his fears had been right and it wasn't a happy reunion. He sighed.  
  
"I liked our last reunion better," he admitted.   
  
"Is it the looks?" he added, trying to lighten up the mood. "It's not that bad, is it? I mean, it could have been worse... It's not the bowtie, is it? Cause bowties are cool!" He was rambling now and he knew it. He just couldn't seem to help it.

Rose didn't even realize she had started to cry.  
  
Her hands went to her cheeks, wiping at the tears.  
  
She finally turned and  _really_  looked at him. He did look different. In her anguish she hadn't even noticed.  
  
"You've changed again, Doctor.... What happened?"

The Doctor's eyes were fixed on her as she fully turned to him. She looked so beautiful, but at the same time so sad. Why was she sad? Angry he could understand, but sad? He let her go so she could be happy. She was NOT supposed to be sad!  
  
At her question he sighed. "Life happened, Rose," he said, sounding resigned. Now that Rose was back it felt like all the emotions and feelings of his previous regeneration came rushing back at him. Of course he always remembered what it was like when he was still in his 10th body, but it was a bit distant. Now... not so much anymore. He remembered just how much he cared about Rose and how hard it had been when he regenerated. He really hadn't wanted to change and become someone else. It was a bit silly of course, his new regeneration was awesome. He was fun and... happier. Yes, he was happier than he had been in the end, before his last regeneration.  
  
The Doctor sighed and pushed away those thoughts. He didn't want to feel it all again. And besides, Rose was here! And she was crying.  
  
He stepped forward, until he was standing right in front of her, then he reached out and gently brushed away her tears.  
  
"The more important question is: what happened to you."

Her eyes closed as his fingers touched her face. It was almost like a dream. A dream she didn't want to take from.  
  
She frowned as if he was supposed to know what had happened to her. Then she remembered, of course he didn't.  
  
"Life, as you said, happened."  
  
She got up and started pacing around in front of him.  
  
"Let's see... Short version? You send me back to the other universe with your human half. Everyone I know goes on with their lives; having kids, getting married, jobs and the like. Your human half gets cancer and dies in just a few short months. I'm left alone, again. This time watching everyone around me happy and together. I started working for Torchwood for awhile. It became too hard though. Being alone -- all of it. Mostly knowing you were over here and I would never see you again and you had just abandoned me. Sure, I know," she said, putting her hand up to forestall him, "You thought it was for the best and your human half needed me, blah blah blah. Well, that just worked out perfectly didn't it?" she said bitterly.  
  
She snorted at her own question and stopped, turning, her back to him.  
  
"Finally, I'd had enough. I went to the roof of Torchwood and was thinking about ending it, was looking down at the ground when... I don't even know what happened really --- something strange happened and it was like I was falling but I hadn't jumped ... yet ... and then I face planted into some grass."

The Doctor watched her closely as she repeated his words. He knew then that things really didn't go the way he had planned. Something bad must have happened. Her next words confirmed it. And it was worse than he had imagined. Cancer... he never even would have considered something like that. Time Lords didn't get cancer. The other Doctor must have been even more human than he thought. And he had left her with him... a version of him that died on her. And he didn't just die; he died of cancer, which meant that she had to watch him go slowly and probably painfully.   
  
The Doctor just stared at her, unable to comprehend how things could have gone so wrong. He had wanted only the best for Rose, had even sacrificed his own happiness to give her what she truly deserved. But instead of making sure that she was happy he had only caused her suffering. He had done this to her. Once more he had destroyed the life of someone who meant so much to him.   
  
 _"Well, that just worked out perfectly didn't it?"_  
  
The Doctor winced at her words. She was right. He had ruined it all for her. It was his entire fault. But what was worse was that he had done it, too, gone on with his life, like she had said everyone else did. He had even gotten married as well. Guilt rose inside of him, making him feel even worse. And as if that hadn't been bad enough she then told him that she had planned to commit suicide! His Rose... happy joyful Rose Tyler... wanting to kill herself. This was what he had turned her into, and he hated himself for it. Part of him wanted to leave and make sure he would never see her again and mess her up even more. But leaving her was what had done this to her in the first place. He could not abandon her again.  
  
"I'm sorry, Rose, I am so, so sorry," he finally said, his voice barely above a whisper.  
  
Stepping forward he pulled her into his arms, hoping to give her at least a tiny bit of comfort and needing it himself, too. He needed to feel her and know that she was still alive. He had no idea what happened to bring them both here, but he was thankful for it.

"You're sorry?  **YOU'RE SORRY**?!" she screamed, pounding her fists against his chest.  
  
"I trusted you, Doctor. I trusted you and you threw me away... What? Because you thought I'd be better off with your human version? I wasn't! Because he needed someone? Good for him -- why did it have to be him? What about Donna or Martha or ANYONE else? Why me? I think it was about  **YOU** , Doctor!  **YOU**  were too afraid to commit so you sent me away so you didn't have to. YOU didn't want to have to deal with him so you sent him away. That's what you do. You run away or send everyone away that you don't want to deal with or commit to," she threw at him.  
  
Pushing away from him, her face was contorted in rage, tears streaming down her cheeks in steady streams.  
  
"I've got news for you, Doctor. We're wherever the bloody hell we're at and guess? For once in your life, for once you're going to have deal with something without running it. Deal with  **ME**. I loved you. I needed you. Why couldn't you love and need me back?" she asked him. It was the one question that haunted day and night since they parted. Especially during the nights though when it was dark and cold and she was alone.

The Doctor winced as she screamed at him and pounded against his chest, but didn't step back. He deserved all of it.  
  
When she was done and stopped speaking he sighed slightly and tried to make his face as impassive as he could manage before starting to answer her questions. She deserved that he answered them all. She deserved the truth.  
  
"Yes, I thought you were better off with him. I wanted only the best for you, and it seemed like he would be better for you. He only had one life and would age with you... at least that was what I believed. It never even occurred to me that he could get sick." He sighed. Cancer! Too human... he was too human. "If I knew, I never would have left you with him, no matter how much he needed you. And yes, he needed  _you_ , not someone,  _you_. Donna was dying, and Martha... she wasn't you. Martha is great, don't get me wrong." He loved Martha, just not in that way. "But she never meant as much to me as you did," he admitted. "I didn't love her."  
  
The Doctor paused, trying to remember what she said next. She accused him of not wanting to commit. Was she right? Had he been that way? He didn't think so. Yes, he was always hesitant to be with someone, to let himself truly love someone, because he knew that eventually he would lose them. He always did, no matter what. And it hurt. But he had never actually managed to keep his distance as much as he tried to. And he was willing to commit, he had committed... to River. And he would have committed to Rose, he was sure of it.  
  
"You are partly right. I guess I do have commitment issues. Committing to someone, allowing myself to love someone isn't easy for me, and you know why. People might be able to spend their whole life with me, but I can never spend my whole life with anyone." He paused, trying to collect himself. He rarely was as honest as this.  _Rule Nr. 1: the Doctor lies._  He was more used to lying or telling only half of what was true. It was easier. Being really honest made him vulnerable, which was something he pretended not to be. But for Rose he would do anything.   
  
“But despite that, it isn’t true that I never commit to anyone. I have committed myself to people. And I would have… I wanted to be with you, more than anything. The only thing I wanted more was for you to be happy.” And look how that turned out, he added in thoughts. With all his timelord abilities he hadn’t managed to see what his actions would cause for Rose.  
  
“I did love you, Rose,” he finally admitted. He still did, but no matter how much he still loved her, it was too late for them now. He had River now and they were married. He loved River.  
“And I did need you. If I didn’t need you the human Doctor wouldn’t have needed you either. Everything he felt, he felt because I felt it, too.” She had no idea how much he needed her, what a mess he had been without her. It had taken him a long time to move on, and if he hadn’t regenerated, he probably never would have.  
  
The Doctor fell silent, a tear running down his cheek. He couldn’t even remember when he had last been this honest with anyone. He just wished he did it sooner, when he and Rose still had a chance. Now it was too late. But hopefully it wasn’t too late to help Rose. He would never be able to forgive himself if she still intended to kill herself and actually did it.

Rose watched him, watched his face. Her entire body was clenched tight, ready to sprew more rage at him when her whole body suddenly jerked.  
  
Her lips parted in shock as she watched a single tear trail down his cheek. She was simply stunned.  
  
"I just don't understand you. I'm not sure I ever did. The thing that I don't get, is how completely clueless you are for being so smart, Doctor. You think anyone who’s been with you doesn't realize they'd die long before you ever would? You think we don't realize that? You think it doesn't scare us? Depress us? It does. The thing is, we are all willing to live and eventually die, and yes, then you'll be alone again but we'd rather have that time with you, enjoy those years or whatever, and be happy while we can than never be together, never been happy, never know that love. You don't commit to save yourself pain later but don't you see? You don't save yourself anything when it hurts you now too, and not just you but us as well. For being hundreds of years old, you are clueless and in many ways, much less mature than humans. You say you hate how stupid humans can but in some ways, you are worse than us," she said, her voice calm and filled with sadness.  
  
She lifted her to hand to his cheek to trail it down the path the tear had gone.

Hearing her words the Doctor sighed. Rose might think she realized what it was like to outlive everyone you knew, but without being in the situation you simply couldn't. Loosing people you loved was the hardest thing in the world, and it happened over and over again. Whenever he was finally happy again and managed to push the sadness away he lost someone else.  _Like Amy and Rory_ , a tiny voice in his head whispered. He quickly pushed that thought away. He wasn't willing to think about them right now. Hearing that Rose had been thinking about suicide had made him feel bad enough. He didn't want to add to that. He had barely started to feel halfway happy... or at least excited again after meeting Clara and finding out about her mysterious lives. He needed to hold on to that excitement and joy now. He didn't want to go back to being all depressed and sulking day in and day out.  
  
"Maybe I am worse than humans," the Doctor said. "But you don't know what it is like. You were thinking about killing yourself, Rose. And you haven't even lost a tenth of the people I lost," he added before he could stop himself. He usually didn't talk about how he felt, tried to hide the sadness behind a mask of joy and happiness, and even managed so quite well. Sometimes he even managed to convince himself that he was happy. Before he met Rose, he had kind of done that. Unfortunately, the loss of Amy and Rory was still too fresh and came rushing back at him as soon as he had forgotten to keep it locked away for a second. He had hoped finding Clara and travelling with her would help, but he had ended up here instead. And  _this_  wasn't helping. He was supposed to help Rose, but how was he going to do that when he was a mess himself?  
  
"I'm sorry," he said and his hand went to hers, holding it close to the cheek she touched. "Sometimes I don't understand myself either."

"Doctor," she whispered, tears of her own trailing down her cheeks.   
  
"Life is for the living. I think you told me that once or maybe it's just something you'd say. The point is, maybe we should both take a chance. You give up and hide, because you can't bare the loss. I gave up because I couldn't bear losing you. I'll try if you will," she said, almost afraid to hope. She wasn't sure how he'd reply. Mostly she wasn't sure how  _she_  could deal with his reply.

The Doctor sucked in a breath.  _Giving up_  and  _hiding_ , was that what he did? Yes, it was  _exactly_  what he had done. He had hidden in his TARDIS, had even hidden the TARDIS as well... in a cloud! The only reason he had come out of hiding had been Clara, who found him despite his efforts. He hadn't even gone to see River again after they lost her parents. He missed her terribly, but she reminded him of Amy and Rory, and as long as he didn't see her again he couldn't lose her forever either. Every time he saw her brought him closer to the day he lost her. And he would lose her, he knew it, had already witnessed it. He sighed, pushing that thought away.  
  
"I'll try," he promised looking at Rose. "No more hiding and no more clouds!" He smiled slightly. "There is so much to see, so much to do... Mysteries to solve..." He grinned slightly. Rose would surely love to help him figure out how the same woman could live twice or more times. They could travel together again, just like old times. He liked the thought, it felt  _right_. On the other hand... would it be a good idea to take Rose with him? She'd find out about River sooner or later. River had a knack for finding him, and he did want to see her again anyway. He was pretty sure that River and Rose would get along well... under different circumstances. Maybe River wouldn't even mind Rose that much. She was a bit like Jack when it came to relationships. Rose however would definitely NOT be thrilled to find out that he was married now. He should tell her. He  _had_ to tell her. And he had to take her with him. He couldn't leave her now, especially after she told him what she had been about to do. Telling her about River wouldn't be a good idea right now for the same reason. But how could he keep it from her? It would crush her later just the same. He sighed, unsure of what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, comments and kudos feed the inspiration bunny, so keep em coming, please!


	2. Amy & Rory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is happening at the same time as the "11 & Rose (1)" chapter.

Amy put the envelope containing the book manuscript into the mailbox. River had brought the written book by shortly after she and Rory had ended up in the past. Apparently her daughter could find a way to come visit them, unlike the Doctor. But River wasn't a full Time Lord. Maybe she could visit a fixed timeline. Amy wasn't sure why, but she was glad that she could at least see River again. She missed the Doctor though. It was harder to know that she would never see him again than she imagined. Well, she knew that it wouldn't be easy. However, never seeing Rory again would have been worse, which was why she  _had_  to make the decision she made.  
  
Saying goodbye to the Doctor had been hard as well. At least she had had the opportunity to do it properly in the books' afterword. But it had taken her a while to find the right words. Now the manuscript was finally done, including the afterword and she mailed it out to be published. It was all done; her life with the Doctor was over for good. No more adventures, no more surprise visits and no more phone calls either. She sighed and pulled her jacket closer against the cold. Had it really just gotten colder or was she imagining it because it felt like the comfortable presence of the Doctor that tended to make her feel safe and warm had vanished for good? She needed to get back to Rory. He would make her feel better, just like he always did, and he'd remind her why it was the right decision to leave the Doctor.   
  
Walking down a street she turned the corner that would get her 'home' to their new place, but then all of a sudden her surroundings changed. She blinked, surprised.   
  
"What?" she muttered. Hadn't she just thought that her crazy and amazing life was finally over? Wasn't her normal life supposed to start now? No, apparently it wasn't. She laughed slightly.  
  
"Looks like normal isn't in the cards for me," she mused. "Let's find out what's going on and find Rory."

Rory had gone outside to wait for Amy as he was expecting her home soon. She'd gone to put the book in the mailbox. As he walked down the street towards the way she should be coming from, he blinked as his surroundings changed around him.   
  
Squinting, just ahead he saw Amy, who seemed to be muttering.  
  
"Amy? What happened? Are you alright?" he asked, hurrying over, worried.

Amy turned around when she heard Rory's voice. Relief washed through her when she saw him coming towards her. No matter what happened, at least they were still together.  
  
Smiling happily she rushed towards Rory and wrapped her arms around him.  
  
"Now I'm fine," she told him while letting go of him again.  
  
"So... I guess our lives aren't about to get normal any time soon," she stated and looked around. They were in a forest. "I wonder what it is this time..." she added grinning, starting to feel excited. "Come on, let's check this place out." She took his hand and pulled him with her as she started to walk.

His hands closed around hers.  
  
"At least we're together --- that's the only thing that matters to be. I couldn't care less where we are as last we're together," he said, smiling.  
  
Rory chuckled though at her statement, "Normal? I am not sure I remember a time our lives were ever normal. Not even before we met the Doctor considering our daughter was in our lives as we grew up so I don't call that exactly normal."

Amy smiled at Rory. That was exactly how she felt. It was why she let the angel send her back in time. In comparison to Rory nothing else mattered.  
  
Amy snorted at his words. "Yeah, normal isn't us." Apparently that was still the case, even if the Doctor wasn't around. She had barely finished that thought when she saw something blue peeking out from behind a bunch of trees. Her eyes widened. It couldn't be, could it? The Doctor said that they would never be able to see each other again. Had he found a way after all?  
  
"Rory," she said and pointed ahead. "Is that what I think it is?" She whispered as if fearing that speaking louder would make the TARDIS disappear.   
  
She started to walk faster and almost ran at the end. Then she stood in front of the ship that was at least as much a home to her as the house she grew up in, and let out a slight squeal.  
  
"He did it; he found a way back to us!"

Rory was about to say something in reply, probably an agreement when she let out a squeal, pointing and running.  
  
Always with the running.  
  
"Amy!" he started, running after her before putting on the breaks so he didn't slam into her back. His eyes widened as they stood in front of a blue box. He'd never seen anything like it before so it had to be the TARDIS, right?  
  
"This is insane. I thought you said he would never be able to find us again?" he asked, in a low voice, like if he spoke too loud the Doctor might here and say something scolding like did once upon a time.

"That's what he said," Amy answered. "I created fixed time, which means that he couldn't come to us. But we are somewhere else now. Maybe things have changed because of that?" Amy mused, then pulled out her TARDIS key, which she had on a chain around her neck. She hadn't been able to put it away yet.  
  
Opening the TARDIS door she stepped inside, grinning widely then froze. The room was empty, but even more importantly it looked different. Gone was all the red and orange she loved so much, the whole room seemed smaller, and even the console was different.  
  
"What the hell happened here?" she muttered. Yes, she knew that the room could change. They had once seen an old version of it, but still, it was weird.   
  
"Doctor!" she called, ready to demand that the changes would be rectified this very moment!

Rory frowned, looking around, just as Amy had.  
  
"Weird. It never gets any less strange when things change around here," he said, not really meaning the TARDIS, just in general.  
  
"Doctor?" he called out as well.  
  
"Maybe he's not here? You know how he is, he loves to explore," Rory suggested, giving Amy a hopeful look.

"You're probably right," Amy decided. "Maybe he's even looking for us."  
  
She turned around and headed for the door. Stepping outside she called, "Doctor!" as loud as she could.

"You better get your ass back here right now!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, comments and kudos feed the inspiration bunny, so keep em coming, please!

**Author's Note:**

> Remember, comments and kudos feed the inspiration bunny, so keep em coming, please!


End file.
